I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to selectively choose what interactions I will use as evidence of what I am worth so that I end up only choosing all the negative interactions that I have with other people wherein I am able to interpret that another person has "hurt me" and so within this I can blame them and I can abdicate my responsibility over myself and also abdicate my own ability to define myself and determine my own self worth.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be worth the same as / equal to all other selves as one and equal as life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that others are worth more than me and that especially those who treat me poorly are worth the most and have the most power over me and the most power to determine who I am.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that any other person has power over me or who I am or how I express myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to limit myself extensively within these beliefs and patterns of allowing the way that others treat me or the way that others behave to dictate for me who I am or who I can or cannot be.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to accept and allow negative interactions to influence me and tell me about myself as if the way that another person treats me, when they treat me poorly, is indicative of what I am worth, but if and when another person treats me well or as an equal, I dismiss this as probably wrong, probably a fluke, or maybe even a sick joke.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself by the ways that others mistreat me so that the very thing which triggers my own creation of anger and injustice becomes true because I become the person that deserves to be treated that way by my internalization and personalization of mistreatment and abuse through a lack of understanding as to why anyone would treat me that way -- thus personalizing their mistreatment as indicative of who I am rather than indicative of who they are.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become extremely frustrated and angry when and as I see that another person does not seem to understand the impact of their behavior on me. I realize that the impact is mine and my own creation through and as my reactions and my instability. I realize I cannot make another person take responsibility for themselves, and I realize that I am the only person who can take responsibility for myself, and as such I cannot make another person take responsibility for me or my experience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to internalize the mistreatment of other so that I in turn also mistreat others and become abusive of myself and others because I have some misconception that this is where "power" lies... precisely, it is lying to me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe and entrust myself to "power" and power dynamics that I experience through how I am treated in interactions with others so that I give my power over myself over to others for them to abuse as they wish and I accept and allow myself to be changed by these interactions, overpowered by these interactions and my interpretations and reactions to these interactions, instead of maintaining self directive principle of myself in stability.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lose sight of the two basic principles of oneness and equality, whereby I can trust that I am "okay" and I am not "inferior," and treating others as you would like to be treated, whereby I can firstly treat myself as I would like to be treated, and secondly always be looking toward productive and constructive changes in this world by being the person who changes interactions into what is best for all.
When and as I feel as if I cannot trust myself, I stop, and I breathe. I realize I have principles by which to guide myself in oneness and equality and so can trust that I am not inferior, and treating others as I would like to be treated, and so can honestly consider my actions and behavior within and without. I commit myself to guiding myself by these principles in all moments, and especially to come back to these principles when I feel lost or like I cannot trust myself. I commit myself to use these principles as cross referential points to see myself and how my behavior within and without is or is not aligned with these principles and then to adjust myself accordingly through self forgiveness and further self commitments.
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