Thoughts & Back Chat as Energy - Day 137

Building some on yesterday: Adding Layers of Energy to Avoid Facing Self (Holding Onto Energy is Holding Self Back) - Day 136


As I continue on practicing moving through energy and not allowing myself to hold on, get hung up on, or clog myself with any particular emotion or feeling, I am seeing also how thoughts and back chat constitute energy in the same way. Even though I am not holding some particular emotional or feeling energy, I am allowing myself to get caught up in my mind in my thoughts and back chat, conversations with myself(/selves), or imaginary conversations with others. It is not so clear to me as of yet exactly how this is detrimental in the same way that I have seen holding onto negative/emotional or positive/feeling energy to be detrimental. Nonetheless it is easy to see how I CREATE my experience and perceptions and thus "my reality" through my thoughts and back chat and conversations in my mind. And so that alone, allowing this to happen, is not acceptable. Reality is already here. It does not require my narration or interpretation. It simply is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to engage in thoughts and back chat in my mind at various times throughout the day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to engage in ongoing conversations with myself or selves within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to retreat into my mind while engaging in "mindless" tasks in the physical.

I forgive myself for not accepting or allowing myself to be here with myself and with all life, within and as my physical body in physical reality as what is happening in the physical space around me, at the same pace of time as that which is occurring in physical reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become bored by "mindless" monotonous tasks, or tasks which are frequently repeated, such that I retreat into my mind as entertainment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to prefer moving at my mind's fast pace rather than slowing myself down to the pace of my breath, the in and out of time passing and movements in the physical.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to replay events in my mind, sometimes with small twists of what could have been different, or to play out imagined scenarios, all in my mind. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself therefore to actively participate in warping my own memories as I replay them and reshape them into something they were not in reality, within my mind. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine alternate future realities, realities which are not here, by imagining scenarios which have not happened.

I forgive myself therefore for trying to create an alternate reality within and as my mind through my thoughts, back chat, and self conversations, thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to reject the reality that is here in every moment as now, and thus I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to reject my participation in that real physical reality, thus rejecting myself as life, and rejecting life, rejecting all one and equal as life.


When and as I see myself engaging in conversations, thoughts, or back chat within my mind, especially as a way to entertain or distract myself from what is really here in physical reality, I stop and I breathe. I realize that within this I am not really here within and as my human physical body, but am existing within and as my mind. I realize too that this is the process by which I create expectations, hopes, desires, and also one avenue toward energy vacuums of emotions and feelings as reactions to my own thoughts. I commit myself to really stopping, and breathing, and bringing myself back to the reality of my human physical body and what I am doing as I am moving, breathing, seeing, sensing, etc. I commit myself to slow myself down to the pace of reality.